Sunday, January 01, 2006

Happy new year to me...



Do not fear going forward slowly, fear only to stand still...

They say ignorance is bliss. I feel otherwise. Blog i am sorry for being ignorant. This was partly because i wasnt home and i cant write under prying eyes...i need to vent out myself within my own spectrum...
sometimes you need to be there...
sometimes you need to feel...
sometimes you have to give in...
sometimes you have to let go...
sometimes you have to falter...
sometimes you have to lose...
sometimes you have to cry...
sometimes you have to be...
sometimes you have to sucuumb...
sometimes you have to gather yourself...
sometimes you have to...
just have to...
New year...huh.
New beginning!!!
concentrate N E W beginning...hahahahahahahaha
time for drunkards to lie low and prowl...to be free and drunk...
time for the rich to party...
time for the poor to recoil...
time for the players to pimp around...
time for the gurls to look good...
why the anxiety?
why the exhiliration?
why the wannabe-ism?
why?
for me new year was just another year which had gone down the drain. Two days spent with my best friend while ignorin others...i felt selfish yet i couldnt help it...
my life remains a mystery and id rather keep it that way...for reasons best known to some motherfucker who resides in my head...
i want to be happy...
i want to be free...
i want to goooooooo...
i want to breathe...
i want to love...
but something...somewhere...wouldnt let me...
maybe my Lord wouldnt let me...
i see people...
impatient...materialistic...ambitions...proud...while i stand there...
in a nook...
in a corner...
in a murky passage...
in another land...
far far away...
where there was no one but me...
sometimes i pretend to fall asleep...
i want to fool my conscience...
so that i can pry...
so that i can explore...
i take in so much...i cant pain people...
neither can i stand witness to it...
i want answers but my questions wouldnt let go...
i am bounded when id rather be free...
i am in clasps when id rather be soaring...
i am lost when id rather be well on my way...
i am alone when id rather be with her...
that is my life...
i play with myself so that you wouldnt know...

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